2.5 hour stroll through my settlement.

I had to take a 45-minute nap to try and restore my sense of humor after spending over two hours with the mediator today. Why is it that when I ask a lawyer for clarification I get a 20-minute discourse that leaves me further befuddled? Why can't lawyers communicate clearly? Ours likes to use her hands and I find myself desperately searching her finger triangles and air diagrams looking for meaning.

Our kitchen-sink but standard and simple settlement is over 30 pages long and includes language like this:

"A general release does not extend to claims which the creditor does not know or suspect to exist in his favor at the time of executing the release, which if known by him must have materially affected his settlement with the debtor."

Fun! I think I'll top the day off with a good bikini waxing and maybe watch some re-runs of speeches given by George W. Bush.