I read this little article in Psych Central at 5:30 this morning. (My oldest had to be at school by 6:30 for a field trip.) It made me want to rewind my entire life and re-shoot it. I think I have mentioned how ex accused me of being incapable of intimacy our entire marriage. This is why.

A bit defensive are we?

People! There's no softer, easy way or any substitute for feeling your feelings. You must feel them. Apparently, it won't kill you.

A few tidbits. (If you're seeking mental health and a fulfilling relationship, you should read the whole thing.)

When you avoid feeling the emotions of vulnerability that are a natural aspect of being human, unwittingly, you become the cause of your own suffering.

When, in order to avoid these feelings, you blame others or events for the pain you feel inside, you act in ways that are contrary to the best interests of your relationship.

When your relationships are on the line, so is your health and your happiness.

The choice is clearer now thanks to recent advances in the study of the brain. Will you take the helm as the captain of your life, as the agent and creator of your experiences, or remain a passive onlooker reacting to and hoping to avoid crises, perhaps even thinking of your self as a victim of certain persons or circumstances?

 Yeah, now you tell me.