Baby fever.

Above-the-waist old man pants.

 

 Everywhere I look women are having babies or being pregnant: Faux Fuschia, Rachel Zoe, all those Spice Girls.

I did not like puking AND STILL gaining weight for nine months. Once I had my boys and was home with them, most of the time I was so bored I thought I was crazy. Seriously. I talked with my doctor. Even still, I'm missing those days. I never thought it would happen to me.

Here are a few photos. This is how old I am; my children's baby pictures are on film, i.e. negatives and paper. I had to photograph a 35mm print with my digital camera then transfer it to ye old laptop. (Oh, soon after the photo on the right was taken, we got a digital camera, but ex has all the photos on his laptop.) Mario is still cute, is he not?

Those cheeks! That mouth!

Heh heh.

This was before the days of blogs and Facebook. Back then, all I had to reach out to other adults was my telephone and dial-up email. (These things could not be used at the same time.) I often wonder if I wouldn't have felt so lonely and isolated had I had an online community back then. And online suits me because apparently I only like other moms digitally, not in person. I did have a subscription to Brain, Child for a sanity check, and actually published a few pieces with them. Those editors understood the downs of parenting--long, unpaid hours, the doubts and struggles. (The ups, after all, are a given--cuteness, recreation and procreation of a better self, blah, blah, blah...) But that magazine arrived only monthly and I was finished with it in a few days. I also had brief respites with Anne Lamott and my What to Expect the First Year book, but no daily dose like what is available today.